The real skinny about transformation is that it must begin inside. We all have bits of our lives that we would like to magically change. It would be nice if we could, for example, simply change partners in a troubled relationship and have it all be hunky-dory. But in order to accomplish real transformation of anything we have to begin at the beginning, and no real transformation begins with the outer picture. A willingness to discover the truth of how we got where we are is required, and that may prove uncomfortable. If we don’t take that step first, however, we will simply “rinse and repeat” our life stories. And frankly, that can get really boring for our friends who have to hear about our crap.
Transformation = trans+form. It is beyond the form of whatever we imagine needs changing.
We participate in creating all the forms in our lives, even those we later resist. That can be tough to swallow, I know, but there it is. A good first step might be looking at the accepted beliefs we brought to the party. Those might include false notions about oneself or another, or some projection on our part or expectations that require mind reading for another to understand. Regardless, that internal look is where we must start. What gets uncovered in this exploration can be surprising, to say the least. But the real adventure of true transformation is that it will never leave us where it found us.